"To Sleep, Perchance to Dream- Ay, there's the Rub." (~Shakespeare, Hamlet)

I like to sleep. I think it's a result of having to be at the bus stop by 6:45 as a kid. That meant getting up pretty early. In high school, I got out of 5th period study hall to ostensibly work on my student government duties, but in reality I kept a pillow in the SGA office and slept the entire hour. In college I was fond of saying, "It's a beautiful day outside, I should be home sleeping." Sleep is why I've never taken up golf. I figure if I've got four hours to kill, I could be napping.

None of this means I'm lazy. Not by any means. I just make wise use of my time by sleeping as long as I can. This has not changed since I've been in Afghanistan. I typically am in my office by 7:45 a.m. But that means I sleep until 7 a.m. Or at least I try to do so. That brings us to today's story.

I am fortunate to have some great guys in my B Hut. There is an army sergeant and there are three navy petty officers in addition to me. All from different areas of the country; all with very different sleeping habits and means of getting up in the morning.

Every morning brings its own rude awakening. Today, however, bordered on the ridiculous. Kevin's alarm always goes off at 6am. It consists of a mildly annoying chirping sound, which I believe originates from his cell phone. Today he got up and went to the bathroom after the alarm went off. That's all fine and well, but he forgot to shut off his radio/alarm clock, which always turns on five minutes after his cell phone alarm. This thing produces a horrific buzzing sound that does not stop until the owner shuts it off. I'm sure you get the picture. While Kevin is showering and doing his thing in the bathroom, his radio alarm is buzzing like mad. The rest of his roommates are cussing and yelling, but no one is going to get out of his warm bed to shut the thing off. So everyone just lays there from 6:05 to about 6:15 while this thing blares on and on.

Kevin finally returns from the loo, realizes his mistake, and shuts the thing off. In the meantime, Joe decides to get up and he turns on the lights to the entire B Hut. There's no hiding from the light. But the real adventure is only beginning. Cordell's alarm starts going off. He has one of those old time bell alarms. You know, the kind with the manual clock face and two bells on top that ring incessantly. Cordell can never get up on the first ring. He always, ALWAYS hits the snooze. One morning I counted him hitting the snooze ten times. TEN!!!

Cordell finally got up after about the fifth snooze break this morning and went to the bathroom. Well guess what? He never turned the alarm off - he only hit the snooze button. So five minutes later it goes off again.

RRRRIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG!!!!!!!

At this point I am about to "go postal." I storm over to his bunk, grab the alarm and throw it outside in the snow while it is still ringing. I'm not doing this to create reading material for you; I've really and truly lost it at this point. So Cordell's clock is lying in the snow ringing and finally I hear some Canadians walk by and apparently they shut the thing off.

So that was my morning. I suppose that being awakened in this manner is better than being awakened by shell fire, but I'm not so sure about that.